Dear Kay:
My daughter became potty trained about when she was about three years old. Now at 3 1/2 she is pooping in her pants again. She still pees in the potty without incident, but she will do everything in her power now to not poop on the potty.
She did it fine for about four months then she just started going in her pants
again. I have tried everything I can think off to get her to go again
and nothing is working. My husband and I are going through a separation, but that is a recent happening, she started slipping long before any of that started, so my question is how do I re-potty train her and why would she back track? She did have a lot of issues with constipation, she was on medication for awhile, but that is under
control now.
Thanks,
Stacy
Dear Stacy
Sometimes little ones
just regress. There is no magic cure. Just ignore it and outwait her. It
is very important not to react when she has an accident as you can
reinforce her behavior by reacting. Positive or NEGATIVE reinforcements
will almost always make the behavior increase not decrease. In other
words if she has an accident and you say oh no, or you frown or give
some indication of your displeasure it can have the same impact as when
she goes in her potty and you tell her that she was a good girl or how
happy you are with her. Always make sure your positive reinforcement is
more profuse than any negative and preferably no reaction is better than
a negative reaction.
I would suggest you take a two month break
from potty training because you can get into a power struggle with a 3
year old that you won't win and will make you both miserable.
I
promise you she will start to potty in the potty. I don't hear of any 5
year olds who go to kindergarten pooping in their pants. This too shall
pass. Don't let it be such a big deal and you will find her doing what
she needs to do shortly.
Best Wishes!
M Kay Keller
