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Questioner: Bill Long Subject: "How To Keep your Kids Away From "Shady Characters"
Question: Hi, I am not a father yet,but I plan to be one in a few years and would like to be prepared. I would like to hear your thoughts. I am a firm believer that if a kid grows up with the wrong group of kids they will turn out to be a disappointment
(When I mean by disappointement I do mean that my kids must have straight A's and got to Harvard,that would be nice though,but I know that you can not always get what you want in life,but I want them to be not selfish and not have a "Me First attitude".
If you assume and are right with your assumption that your young kid's best friend(s)might act polite to their elders but overall they are rough around the edges and are a bad influence to your kid should you tell you kids to hang up with a different group of friends? Whenever you have time email me back please.
Answer: Dear Bill,
Well it is pretty important to be careful about the adults you expose a child to however, picking their friends for them doesn't exactly teach them how to take care of themselves emotionally. Building a trusting, caring a supportive relationship with them will do more for keeping them on the right track.
Teaching them how to make positive choices by setting them up with positive outcomes to choose from will do more for their ability to make wholesome choices than attempting to control them and trust me controlling anyone else is only an illusion. There are several books I recommend for parents or people who want to become parents and desire to "steer" their children in the right direction.
Gavin DeBecker's "Protecting the Gift" and "The Gift of Fear" are excellent books which share how to set up experiences with children which teach them to listen to their inner compass.
Then "Positive Parenting" and "Parenting from the Inside Out" are both excellent books on parenting with ease and skill.
Next, the Nurturing Parenting Program at www.nurturingparenting.com customer number #110, has a curriculum of activities and parenting education from pregnancy through the teen years.
Make this your how to manual. You are on the right track to be seeking out this information now rather than after you have children!
M Kay Keller