Subject: daughter's self conscious
Question: My 11 year old daughter refuses to wear shorts in the hot humid weather and insists on wearing long pants & jeans are summer long. All of her girlfriends & her sister wear shorts everyday all summer long and they are always teasing her why she doesn't wear shorts too and they are alway asking her how she can stand wearing pants & jeans all the time. My daughter is not over weight and has nothing wrong with her legs. She Is always complaing to me that's it's so hot out that she's hot & sweaty . I've told her over & over again to start wearing shorts and she'll be cooler. I have asked her why she doesn't want to wear shorts and she's says because she's feels naked & like everyone will be staring at her legs. I tryed to explained to her that their is so much comfort & will be cooler wearing shorts in the heat and that you actually stand out more wearing pants & jeans, when everyone else is wearing shorts. I mean she's just about the only kid in the whole school that doesn't wear shorts in the summer. We were at the Mall today and I was picking out some new pairs of shorts for me and my other daughter. and I told her to pick out some shorts for herself too , but she refused to even look at the shorts on the racks.
With the hot weather coming soon, I want her to get over this , this summer any advice or ideas how I can get her over this ?
Answer: Dear Jennifer:
My first response is to share that you need to pick your battles wisely and this is not a wise battle. Let her figure it out on her own.
However you could also start complimenting her on how nice she looks when she is at home without her friends. Build her up and tell her how attractive she is etc....then let her figure the rest out on her own.
She is 11 and she is capable of figuring out how to dress according to the weather. When she dresses too warmly and then complains about it, simply respond by asking her what she intends to do about it or ask her how it is working for her by refusing to wear cooler clothes. Maybe you could compromise by getting her Capri pants made out of a lighter cotton material.
M Kay Keller