Tuesday, June 29, 2010

8 year old acting out sexually

Questioner: tasha

Subject: my 8 year old son

Question: I HAVE AN 8 YEAR OLD BOY AND A 2 YEAR OLD LITTLE GIRL. THEY WERE PLAYING IN MY ROOM AND THEY WERE REALLY QUIET SO I ASKED MY HUSBAND TO GO CHECK ON THEM. I WAS BUSY COOKING AND CLEANING. WHEN HE WALKED IN ON THEM HE FOUND THEM BOTH NAKED AND MY SON WAS BEHIND MY DAUGHTER AN SHE WAS ON ALL FOURS. WHAT DO I DO THIS IS DRIVING ME CRAZY. I FEEL I NEED TO KEEP THEM APART. I HAVE SET AN APPOINTMENT WITH THE SCHOOL COUNSELOR. IS THIS NORMAL.

Answer: Dear Tasha,

I am glad you took the steps to get to a counselor. While "naked play" is normal within a year or two of the child's age range...and 8 year old is 6 years older than a 2 year old. I can hear your fear. It won't help you or them. You did the right thing and yes keep them apart until you get to the bottom of what is going on with your son.

I don't mean to increase your fear however at the age of 8 he knew this was not appropriate to do with a 2 year old. Or if he didn't that is a huge challenge as well. Either way your son needs to be seen by a therapist.

Stick with it. Again you did the right thing by not overlooking this behavior. They are both fortunate to have you as a mom. No matter how hard it is keep with it until this is resolved. Don't allow anyone to convince you that you are overreacting. Your reactions are healthy!

Best Wishes!

M Kay Keller